re: What are women actually attracted to?

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And then if a later partner triggers that same place in your primitive brain, you are right back in the shite. It’s very hard not to react if someone hits that specific fight or flight response. PTSD is a real thing. And some people always have one foot in the scary past and another in the fearful future. Not good for relationships .

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This is why some ppl need counseling.

Life is messy. Sometimes it’s our own fault, sometimes not.

But nonetheless - it distorts our ability to interact in a healthy manner with others and can be triggering.

That’s why imho, really good counseling is so important.

It’s not at all healthy to live both in the past and fearful of the future. That’s a recipe for failure imho.
It’s very helpful to know your own triggers, and to be equipped with the ability to look broadly at the underlying fear and dismantle it before it causes any future problems.