re: Why do people always blame the victim when things happen?

They should have been charged with cruelty to animals at the time they did it. Letting the cat out in a field would qualify as that crime.

If family is shitty, write them off and put them on ignore. Don't keep fighting. You'll find peace by just pretending they don't exist. No drama. No "I'm not talking to you." No discussions.

"Are you coming for Thanksgiving?" "No, thank you." End of discussion.

I spent 20 years ignoring the existence of my older sister, who was giving me grief and stressing me out. Smart move, and I have no regrets doing it. We get along today, somewhat.

Writing off shitty family members, if someone can do it, can be a useful tool.