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re: Honest to God true story you experienced that you don't think the OT will believe
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:15 pm to upgrayedd
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:15 pm to upgrayedd
quote:
I saw Ryan Gosling at a grocery store in Los Angeles. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”
I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
I refuse to believe this story. It's just way too funny.
1
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:15 pm to touchdownjeebus
quote:
I’m a smart arse by nature and I had already had more than a few beers, so I retort, “nah man. No one knows who the frick Mario is, Slater. Btw, why were you a dick to screech and dated the junkie girl on SBTB? Zach was way cooler than you and Kelly was slumming when she paid you any mind.”
He should have bounced your head off the table. Hope you've grown up since then.
This post was edited on 9/16/22 at 12:25 pm
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:18 pm to CAD703X
What’s her name and address so I know to avoid her?
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:20 pm to CAD703X
quote:
She is the most insane female I've personally known.
That's a bold statement, CAD
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:22 pm to Arkapigdiesel
At a restaurant when my oldest son was about 2 years old. He was a live wire always throwing stuff randomly. He is sitting across the table from me next to my wife who was looking down at the menu. The couple at the table behind us has a baby in an infant carrier sitting on the floor next to their table. Out of the corner of my eye I see my son grab a fork and wind up to hurl it in the direction of that baby in the infant carrier. It happened so fast I couldn't even get the word NO put of my mouth when I see him whip that fork at blinding speed across the table. In a flash I'm praying it doesn't hit that little baby....im bracing for a loud clanging sound from the fork hitting something but it's just dead silence. No sound at all. Where is fork? As luck would have it the waiter happened to be walking between our table and the other one at such an angle that the fork landed between his lower back and the big receipt book sticking out of his back pocket. The waiter never even felt it. It was a million to one shot
This post was edited on 9/16/22 at 12:24 pm
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:23 pm to CAD703X
I have a ton of crazy stories most wouldn’t believe and I probably shouldn’t share.
I’d share in person but not on here, most of it was illegal or incredibly crazy. I’ve had quite the life tbh I don’t know how I’m alive or not in jail
I’d share in person but not on here, most of it was illegal or incredibly crazy. I’ve had quite the life tbh I don’t know how I’m alive or not in jail
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:26 pm to SlimTigerSlap
I believe it originated on 4chan a while ago but still laugh every time I see it.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:27 pm to GRTiger
I drank whiskey with Montgomery Gentry and ZZ Top on MG’s tour bus during Sturgis back in early 2000’s.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:37 pm to theunknownknight
quote:
John Goodman riding a bike
I don’t believe you.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:42 pm to member12
quote:
quote:
John Goodman riding a bike
I don’t believe you.
I saw John Goodman carry 2 100lb blocks of ice in grand isle when I was 18 or 19. He did it like it was nothing.
Other people who have encountered him have described similar displays of freakish strength.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:44 pm to CAD703X
I have posted this before but I walked through a time warp in my neighborhood when I was about 12-14 or so. I walked through an alley in my neighborhood (big city neighborhood near downtown) and out the other side it was how I would imagine the land looked prior to the 1950s when it was developed. Just saw grass and some trees. It freaked me out and I ended up running back home and didn’t leave the house for about a month.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:46 pm to touchdownjeebus
quote:
This was right around the time he married that Landry girl
I saw Ali back in May buying a few things at a small grocery store. She's just a naturally beautiful person and very easy to talk to.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:49 pm to CAD703X
Got arrested for double teaming a hooters waitress on a roof of a Dallas Apt complex clubhouse. Guessing somebody saw and called. Cops must have all been like “I gotta see this shite” cause there were 6-7 units including a suburban. All rolled up like it was a drug sting. The complete story is absolutely hilarious. Since I went to jail in nothing but a beach towel, I decided to give them every piece of bad info I could. Misspelled my name, wrong SS#, couldn’t remember which apt was mine cause we just moved in, etc. Not a strategy that would work if it were a “real” crime but everybody at the jail thought it was extremely amusing. Still have no clue why they bothered to bring us in. Took mug shot & prints. Spent the night in an orange jump suit, got bailed out in the morning. The jailers all high fived me on the way out.
ETA: this one…just south of grapevine on 121. Was called Mansions by the Vineyard at the time. Crazy bitch was trying to see if she could get into that lighthouse thing
ETA: this one…just south of grapevine on 121. Was called Mansions by the Vineyard at the time. Crazy bitch was trying to see if she could get into that lighthouse thing
This post was edited on 9/16/22 at 1:13 pm
Posted on 9/16/22 at 12:53 pm to CAD703X
My beagle jumped up and grabbed a corn dog out of my daughters hand. He swallowed it whole, with the stick, while I tried to chase him down. He crapped it out 3 weeks later, shitkabob standing in the yard. I told the vet about it on the dog's next visit. I had taken pictures and put a dollar bill up against it for reference. Vet said that was one of the craziest things he had seen.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 1:02 pm to Babewinkelman
I swallowed a half dollar when I was a kid. Never pooped it out either… it’s probably still inside me.
Tbh haven’t thought about this in like 8 years
Tbh haven’t thought about this in like 8 years
Posted on 9/16/22 at 1:02 pm to CAD703X
I was running in the neighborhood I used to live in in Bham, and I noticed a dead raccoon on the street in front of someone's house. I stopped, looked at the raccoon, and said "poor coon."
When I looked up I noticed the owner of the house I was in front of was standing on his front steps-a black gentleman. He clearly heard me, and looked at me like I was fricking insane. I awkwardly waved, and continued my run. Honest to God true story.
When I looked up I noticed the owner of the house I was in front of was standing on his front steps-a black gentleman. He clearly heard me, and looked at me like I was fricking insane. I awkwardly waved, and continued my run. Honest to God true story.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 1:04 pm to CAD703X
quote:
Honest to God true story
quote:
there was always a huge wet spot on the fabric chair that she sat on.
Bruh...
Posted on 9/16/22 at 1:23 pm to CAD703X
We had a crazy office skank, but not that crazy.
She got caught in a closet by a VP sucking another employees pecker and neither got fired, because the VP was a sexual deviant himself.
Fast forward a few months...
Company is having a grand opening party for a new satellite branch, customers and employees invited with free food and alcohol. As it got late and the party wound down, most had left with exception of a couple dozen people, most of who were drunk. The company skank mentioned above jumped up on a table and yelled "I'm ready to frick" Then the table flipped over and she crashed to the ground. She was fine, but one of our drunk customers decides he is going to take here up on that offer.
Later, He tells everyone "I'm going to take here home" and leaves. About 20 minutes later someone comes in says the girl is laying out in the parking lot. We ran outside and found her laying face down is a pool of her own barf and it also appeared she had shat herself and it ran down her legs. We guessed it happened in the car with the customer as they were fooling around and he kicked her out.
Someone had to call her husband to come get her. He was one mad dude.
Anyway, all three of these people were fired within a one year period.
She got caught in a closet by a VP sucking another employees pecker and neither got fired, because the VP was a sexual deviant himself.
Fast forward a few months...
Company is having a grand opening party for a new satellite branch, customers and employees invited with free food and alcohol. As it got late and the party wound down, most had left with exception of a couple dozen people, most of who were drunk. The company skank mentioned above jumped up on a table and yelled "I'm ready to frick" Then the table flipped over and she crashed to the ground. She was fine, but one of our drunk customers decides he is going to take here up on that offer.
Later, He tells everyone "I'm going to take here home" and leaves. About 20 minutes later someone comes in says the girl is laying out in the parking lot. We ran outside and found her laying face down is a pool of her own barf and it also appeared she had shat herself and it ran down her legs. We guessed it happened in the car with the customer as they were fooling around and he kicked her out.
Someone had to call her husband to come get her. He was one mad dude.
Anyway, all three of these people were fired within a one year period.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 1:33 pm to Schmelly
quote:
The jailers all high fived me on the way out.
No, they didn't.
Posted on 9/16/22 at 1:42 pm to CAD703X
That's pretty wild. That's hard to top, but there truly is some crazy women out there.
We had a guy who was the manager of project controls got arrested and charged with attempted murder. He tried to run over his wife with his truck. I don't really know all the details, I just know that he took like 3 weeks off from work. He came back and almost a year later their was a trial. He was found not guilty. The day after the trial was over he was fired.
But the girl you describe sounds like Jennifer Aniston's character in Horrible Bosses.
We had a guy who was the manager of project controls got arrested and charged with attempted murder. He tried to run over his wife with his truck. I don't really know all the details, I just know that he took like 3 weeks off from work. He came back and almost a year later their was a trial. He was found not guilty. The day after the trial was over he was fired.
But the girl you describe sounds like Jennifer Aniston's character in Horrible Bosses.
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