re: Armageddon is the finest film ever made

Buscemi has some great lines in this one. When they're going out for their "last night on earth":

“This place is like Dr. Seuss's worst nightmare!”

“You are so messin' with national security right now, man! You are fired tomorrow morning, I'm tellin' ya! I'll get the CIA and the FBI, you'll be workin' security at Toys R' Us!”


“- Grace Stamper: First time I got my period, Rock had to take me into Tai-Pei for Tampax. And then he had to show me how to use them, Harry.
- Rockhound: Ho-ho. I ju- No I-I told her how to use it. I didn't show her, Harry.”

“- Chick: I never told anybody this before, but I hate flyin'. So it would be an awful shame to die now.
- Rockhound: That's easy for you to say. I owe 100 grand to a fat-arse loan shark which I spent on a stripper named Molly Mounds.
- Chick: Boy, that's bad.”

"You wanna compare brainpans? I won the Westinghouse prize when I was 12. Big deal. Published at 19, so what. I got a double doctorate from MIT at 22. Chemistry and Geology. I taught at Princeton for two and a half years. Why do I do this? Because the money's good, the scenery changes and they let me use explosives, okay?"



And their list always cracks me up.

" Just a few things here.
Nothing really big. Just-- Well, as an example--
Uh, Oscar here's got some outstanding parking tickets. Wants 'em wiped off his record.
Fifty-six tickets in seven states.
I'll tell him, Oscar. I got it. Okay.
Uh, Noonan's got two women friends...
that he'd like to see made American citizens, no questions asked.
Max would like you to bring back eight-track tapes.
Not sure if that's gonna work, but let's see what else.
Chick wants a full week's Emperor's Package at Caesar's Palace.
Hey, you guys wouldn't be able to tell us who actually killed Kennedy, would ya?
Uh, Bear would like to stay at the...
White Horse.
White House. White House.
White House. Yeah, he'd like to stay in the Lincoln Bedroom of the White House...
for the summer.
Stuff like that.
Sure, I think we can take care of some of that.
Harry!
Yeah, one more thing.
None of them wanna pay taxes again.
Ever."