re: How do people cope with separation or divorce?

I’ll answer from my perspective. Happened to me 11 years ago.

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How do people keep their minds from going to crazy dark places and handle their shite?

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Fact is, you can’t. The human mind is the most amazing and most dangerous thing on the planet at the same time. The best way forward is for you to get to the mindset that these thoughts and feelings are normal for what you’re going through. Once you accept the normalcy of it, it happens less and less. And it won’t happen until you’re ready. People, like me, will tell you what to do and how to cope, but the fact is, you’re the only one who decides when and how you’re going to start to step forward again.

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This is unbelievably hard. I just want to reset my brain or something.

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It is hard. Behind the death of a spouse or child, it’s probably the hardest thing you’ll ever go through. But you don’t want to reset your brain. You need these experiences. They are part of what it means to be human. It’s how we learn and grow to be better people in the future.

Lastly, yes, Jordan Peterson is a great resource. But don’t just watch his videos. Buy the 12 rules for life and 12 more rules for life books and begin the process of making yourself a better person. Then get other books to help you along the path. I’d also recommend the Bible if you’re of that nature. It sure got me through some rough days.

Whether the split was your doing or not, focus on the only thing in this world you can control. Yourself.