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re: Give me all of your stupid jokes
Posted on 1/22/19 at 7:33 pm to X123F45
Posted on 1/22/19 at 7:33 pm to X123F45
A man is on a cruise ship and disaster strikes. The ship sinks and he manages to swim to an island nearby. He sets up shop awaiting rescue.
Before long he finds a woman. Not just any woman, it's (insert your favorite famous beauty queen here - Angelina Jolie will do here). For real. She barely made it but it looks like it's just the two of them for awhile.
The man immediately gets to work building shelter, hunting and fishing, doing whatever it takes to survive. At first she gives him the cold shoulder since he's a peon and she's a famous celebrity. But as the months go by and it's still just the two of them, one stormy night when they're both cowering in a cozy but sturdy shelter they fall for each other anyway.
Six months go by, and they've been doing the deed nearly every day.
Then the day finally comes. She notices something is wrong and asks him about it. He says "Well, it's nothing really."
"No, please tell me! It's really bothering me if something is a problem between us!" she says.
He pauses. "Okay. Fold up all your hair underneath this hat so I can't see any of it." She's puzzled, but complies.
"Now wear this shapeless cloth so I can't tell you're a woman." She's really puzzled now, but whatever.
"Now turn around and start walking down the beach away from me!"
Sobbing, she starts that lonely walk. Thinking about how she had wanted to introduce him to the world as the man who'd saved her, instead of just another Hollywood fake. And what went wrong???
Suddenly she hears footsteps pounding up behind her. He grabs her, whirls her around, and says "DUDE! You wouldn't BELIEVE who I've been schtupping the past six months!"
Before long he finds a woman. Not just any woman, it's (insert your favorite famous beauty queen here - Angelina Jolie will do here). For real. She barely made it but it looks like it's just the two of them for awhile.
The man immediately gets to work building shelter, hunting and fishing, doing whatever it takes to survive. At first she gives him the cold shoulder since he's a peon and she's a famous celebrity. But as the months go by and it's still just the two of them, one stormy night when they're both cowering in a cozy but sturdy shelter they fall for each other anyway.
Six months go by, and they've been doing the deed nearly every day.
Then the day finally comes. She notices something is wrong and asks him about it. He says "Well, it's nothing really."
"No, please tell me! It's really bothering me if something is a problem between us!" she says.
He pauses. "Okay. Fold up all your hair underneath this hat so I can't see any of it." She's puzzled, but complies.
"Now wear this shapeless cloth so I can't tell you're a woman." She's really puzzled now, but whatever.
"Now turn around and start walking down the beach away from me!"
Sobbing, she starts that lonely walk. Thinking about how she had wanted to introduce him to the world as the man who'd saved her, instead of just another Hollywood fake. And what went wrong???
Suddenly she hears footsteps pounding up behind her. He grabs her, whirls her around, and says "DUDE! You wouldn't BELIEVE who I've been schtupping the past six months!"
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