re: How misguided were kids when they chose grunge over hair metal?

I won't argue your point at all. I think you are spot on in your review.. Grunge was its own thing and largely localized to bands coming out of the Seattle area. It was a lot darker than hair metal which was largely...."happy" . Hair Metal was a co-opt ,If you will, of pop and hard rock and the look was vastly different.

Grunge was all flannel, and rough hewn clothing, hair metal was spandex, teased hair and make up.....show time. Hair Metal had the power ballad, "Every Rose Has It's Thorn" and "Don't Know What You Got, 'til its Gone" sort of stuff.Grunge was angsty...it's tough to find a real love song / power ballad. Grunge reflected a certain existential if not a bit of nihilistic pain. You were not getting that really at all from the Hair Metal guys.

But what did Hair Metal in, I think, is that like other trends in music, the category got saturated and bands were out there that were just copying what other guys in the genre were doing. The final straw to me was Warrant. They seemed to be a cheap knock off of Poison. Who was something in look as a knock off of Motley Crue with the Spandex and makeup, etc.If you were hard rock, record labels were looking for a "look" All of them had to have a power ballad....and that overshadowed some really good music that they were making. Poison actually had some good music. CC Deville was a very good guitarist. Tom Kiefer....maybe one of the best songwriters and a multi instrumentalist...just to give some mainstream examples. Kip Winger was great as well. Mick Mars is vastly underrated as a guitarist and probably should get more love. There was a lot to like from the Hair Metal guys.....and it seemed they were having fun.

Musically, both of them were close. Grunge and Hair were different versions of the blues influenced guitar driven rock that had prevailed since rock music had been born. You could see in both of them the building on of work that was evident even from Carl Perkins back in thelate 50s, Link Wray, Jimi Hendrix (the original grunge ), EVH, etc.. You said Emo....I think that is a better description of the Seattle music than Grunge. There's darkness to it a feeling like they were saying...." Life is fricked up, I don't understand the world, so many contradictions, etc". But there was really good music out there apart from the overall depressing vibe from the lyrics. Pearl Jam still has tight arrangements,Cobain was a good guitarist. Soundgarten worked really well as a unit. STP was great as well....and Alice In Chains was WOW! to me...still is

For me, what really turned me off to rock music- aside from having a 10-12 hr a day career and kids, was the New Metal of Limp Bizkit and Korn and Pantera among others. The music lacks soul. It's guys just assaulting their guitars for the sake of assaulting their guitars ....and your ears. In my opinion there really was not much to recommend it. Just a bunch of fricked up looking dudes with tattoos screeching into a microphone and sped up guitar links and barely any real continuity. Never got the attraction that people had to it.