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re: Have you ever given a eulogy?
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:31 am to Billy Blanks
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:31 am to Billy Blanks
Unfortunately, yes. For both my Paternal Grandmother who raised me after my mom died, and then a few years later my Dad (her son.)
Both were absolutely brutal to do. And yeah, doing through tears each time. Been 20 years for my Dad and I still choke up thinking about doing it.
Both were absolutely brutal to do. And yeah, doing through tears each time. Been 20 years for my Dad and I still choke up thinking about doing it.
0
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:33 am to Billy Blanks
quote:
Have you ever given a eulogy?
Yes
They laughed
They cried
"It was better than Cats"
I am not a good public speaker and am not good at reading a prepared text.
Do practice some lines several times
Do use index cards to have a base to work from
Make it personal, not generic
Speak your mind from your heart
Sorry if you have to do it as I hate public speaking but if the honor was given to you, be the best person you can and press on.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:44 am to Cheese Grits
For better or worse, sure have. It's an honor and a privilege so put a lot into it for my uncle and grandmother both. Hope not to do it again for long time.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:46 am to Billy Blanks
I game my Mom's eulogy. I wrote it the night she died and practiced it with my sister. I could not have done it without the rehearsal. By rehearsing it, it was a little less painful when I actually stood in front of the church and gave it.
I am grateful that I was able to do this final thing for my Mom.
I am grateful that I was able to do this final thing for my Mom.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:49 am to Billy Blanks
I’ve actually done about 200-250 funerals. All manner of deaths: illness, murder, suicide, still born- young, old, tragic, peaceful. Bottom line- there’s always someone hurting that I can help bring hope to. Difficult at times but rewarding.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:52 am to geauxjo
Done 3 close relatives... paternal grandma grandpa and an uncle. Not easy but good sharing memories, in each case i asked for input and stories. Couldn't do my dads
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:54 am to Billy Blanks
I did one a couple months ago. It was one of many uncles and he was in his 90s. While I was sad for his family it wasn't super emotional for me. I don't think I could eulogize a parent of close friend.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 10:57 am to Billy Blanks
I eulogized my Dad in 2018. He had been sick for a while - died at 88 - so, fortunately, I had time to prepare and practice for it and really get my thoughts together. I kept it together, told funny stories which helped. My Mom and sisters were very pleased. I gave them copies of my notes and they said they still will go back and read them from time to time.
Also, at that funeral was a Black friend of mine - we grew up together and have the same last name. WE all understand the implications of this. He called my his brother and his children call me Uncle. He had cancer at that time and said I did such a good job he wanted me to speak at his funeral. His funeral was so large it had to be held in the High School gymnasium - he was on the school board. The gym was packed with a full gospel choir singing. It was a wonderful service that I was honored to participate in. I go to their family reunion every year.
My Mother will be 90 her next birthday. She has asked me to speak at her funeral when the time comes. I am collecting my thoughts and putting things down I want to say. I'll be ready when the time comes.
Also, at that funeral was a Black friend of mine - we grew up together and have the same last name. WE all understand the implications of this. He called my his brother and his children call me Uncle. He had cancer at that time and said I did such a good job he wanted me to speak at his funeral. His funeral was so large it had to be held in the High School gymnasium - he was on the school board. The gym was packed with a full gospel choir singing. It was a wonderful service that I was honored to participate in. I go to their family reunion every year.
My Mother will be 90 her next birthday. She has asked me to speak at her funeral when the time comes. I am collecting my thoughts and putting things down I want to say. I'll be ready when the time comes.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:03 am to OntarioTiger
quote:
Couldn't do my dads
I tapped out on my dad’s also. Just wanted to be a son that day.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:04 am to 777Tiger
quote:Did you end it with “We know you have many choices when choosing carriers and thank you for choosing House of Bultman airlines. On behalf of your mortuary-based in flight crew, thanks for your patronage.”?
did just that a couple of weeks ago, sort of impromptu
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:05 am to soccerfüt
quote:
Did you end it with “We know you have many choices when choosing carriers and thank you for choosing House of Bultman airlines. On behalf of your mortuary-based in flight crew, thanks for your patronage.”?
something pretty close to that
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:13 am to 777Tiger
I’m sure you didn’t refer to the deceased as ”heavy” ATC (at the cemetery).
This post was edited on 5/16/23 at 11:14 am
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:14 am to soccerfüt
quote:
I’m sure you didn’t refer to the deceased as ”heavy” to ATC.
naw, she was pretty light, I did help carry the casket to the rig that they lower it into the grave with though
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:17 am to Billy Blanks
I had to for my Dad's funeral. I usually get emotional in situations like that, even just listening to them. When the time came, I had written 3 bullet points I wanted to make sure to mention. I guess the respect and "proudness" for my Dad took over. Surprisingly, my voice never cracked and I am pretty sure I finished with a slight smile on my face. I'm sure that the fact that several in the audience were smiling as I spoke helped a ton also.
How you deliver something like that for a child? I never want to think about.
How you deliver something like that for a child? I never want to think about.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:19 am to Billy Blanks
I eulogized my father. To this day, the single hardest thing that I have ever done.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:27 am to 777Tiger
Seriously, sorry for the loss.
I’ve also had to do the impromptu eulogy thing at services that weren’t well planned or the planning broke down.
I get prepared to say something before I go to the funeral now.
I’ve also had to do the impromptu eulogy thing at services that weren’t well planned or the planning broke down.
I get prepared to say something before I go to the funeral now.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:31 am to geauxjo
I’ve actually done about 200-250 funerals. All manner of deaths: illness, murder, suicide, still born- young, old, tragic, peaceful. Bottom line- there’s always someone hurting that I can help bring hope to. Difficult at times but rewarding.
Assuming you're a preacher?
Assuming you're a preacher?
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:36 am to soccerfüt
quote:
Seriously, sorry for the loss.
I’ve also had to do the impromptu eulogy thing at services that weren’t well planned or the planning broke down.
I get prepared to say something before I go to the funeral now.
thanks, it was a very close family friend, mother of my wife's best friend, she treated me like a favorite son, in fact that's all I heard the entire weekend(in good nature,) about how I was her favorite, the plan was a wake on Friday night for all friends and extended family, nothing on Saturday(Seventh Day Adventists,) and a graveside service Sunday morning just for immediate family, it was just the couple, their only daughter and her husband and kids, it was mentioned that there would be no one conducting a service per se and anyone could either say something or not, my daughter said a prayer and the family was all hugged up and I just couldn't let it go like that, that family means a lot to us and so I decide to say a few words, mainly expressing gratitude for them allowing me to be a part of the family, relating a few experiences, and reminding them to draw on her strength and continue to love each other, it seemed to have been appreciated
Posted on 5/16/23 at 11:53 am to Billy Blanks
Once. For my grandmother
I completely lost it. Could barely read the words on the page I had written for all the tears.
quote:
I'm always amazed how people can stand up in front of a large crowd at a funeral and deliver an amazing message without losing it.
I completely lost it. Could barely read the words on the page I had written for all the tears.
Posted on 5/16/23 at 12:23 pm to Billy Blanks
Done it twice. First for my brother which was my hero but somehow he must have been with me because I made it through. Then for my mom which was a much smaller setting but equally as difficult. If you ever have to do it, just roll with it. You somehow find the strength.
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