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3
Posted on 5/6/23 at 12:23 am to Havoc
quote:
Get back to the basics.
Who are you?
What do you believe in?
What person do you want to be going forward?
Where do you want to be in 1 year? 5 years?
Do it.
This is the best and most pragmatic advice you'll get here. Redefining those basics is what will set your direction for the short and long term. It sounds simple but it isn't so that will keep your mind busy. Do things you haven't been able to do in years or thought you didn't want to do anymore and that will keep your body busy. Interact with all kinds of different people. Reconnect with old friends. Pick one day a week to do, read, taste SOMETHING you haven't before. The quest to find these things could very well uncover a new hobby or interest.
Posted on 5/8/23 at 9:14 am to Havoc
quote:
Get back to the basics.
Who are you?
What do you believe in?
What person do you want to be going forward?
Where do you want to be in 1 year? 5 years?
Do it.
This is really good advice. There is a person inside you that has dreams and goals and a way forward. Sometimes in a traumatic time like this you need your support network to help draw that person out again.
We all have a good laugh about drink/golf/gambling/sex to break your tailspin, but be careful. Get drunk a few nights and get it out of your system, but do not go months deep into that or your tailspin increases.
Rely on your network. Family. Friends. Therapist if you need it or family and friends aren't available. Spend time, sober, with those people.
The tailspin ends and it's a better place to be, but excessive booze etc... does not help long term.
Posted on 5/31/23 at 8:10 am to Havoc
quote:
Get back to the basics.
Who are you?
What do you believe in?
What person do you want to be going forward?
Where do you want to be in 1 year? 5 years?
Do it.
This is the starting place but I will add to it.
Do not let this be a negative on you life that eats at you for the rest of your life. You cannot let a divorce beat you, you have to turn that divorce into a building block for who you are and what you want to be. Forget it and move on.
Immerse yourself into a new challenge. It may be enrolling in classes for something you have an interest but never thought you could do. Make this your personal challenge. There are two great side benefits of this. 1. You will be keeping your time and mind busy. 2. You will be in a new environment with new people to give you a whole new perspective of life around you.
Lastly, when your mind will not let it go, remind yourself you will not let someone not in your life have that control over you.
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