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re: Swiss Man Mauled By Bear in Cave (13,600 years ago)

Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:03 pm to
Posted by KirbySmartass
Member since Jul 2020
1827 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:03 pm to
quote:

pure hunter-gather lineage (WHG)


Netflix will soon announce plans to cast Beyonce as the hunter gatherer in the upcoming mini series based on the event.
Posted by tigerfan 64
in the LP
Member since Sep 2016
3861 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:04 pm to
quote:

But how did they know he was a man?

Biology was only deemed witchcraft around 2015
All hominids could realistically be identified as man or woman up till that time.
Posted by IAmNERD
Member since May 2017
19313 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:07 pm to
quote:

he was of pure hunter-gather lineage

Was this the OG Aryan Hitler was enamored by?
Posted by OU Guy
Member since Feb 2022
8644 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:09 pm to
See, I think his buddies poisoned him and sent him in the cave. Once bear ate part of him they came in and finished the weakened and poisoned bear off. Then they made a fire and ate the bear after removing anything poisonous.

I hate they create some story and push it.
Posted by KAHog
South Trough
Member since Mar 2013
2404 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:09 pm to
quote:

Is he going to make it?


I had to page back to upvote. Very nice.
Posted by shutterspeed
MS Gulf Coast
Member since May 2007
63536 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:11 pm to
quote:

The man shot the bear, then the bear ran into the cave. Soon after that, the man came into the cave to smoke the bear out, but the bear got pissed and mauled him.


FAFO
Posted by BigBinBR
Baton Rouge
Member since Mar 2023
4328 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:14 pm to
quote:

Had he been a woman, would have survived since the bear could be reasoned with.


This is a woman’s biggest fear. A man and a bear in a cave together!
Posted by auggie
Opelika, Alabama
Member since Aug 2013
28142 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:16 pm to
This is what happens when you leave your pocket knife at home.
Posted by Old Character
Member since Jan 2018
873 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:20 pm to
quote:

Dude had a good orthodontist and dentist.


Our modern diet is the reason our teeth are crooked
Posted by RockoRou
SW Miss
Member since Mar 2015
667 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:30 pm to
Here we go again, scientist making up shite, it never ends.
Posted by clamdip
Rocky Mountain High
Member since Sep 2004
17950 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:33 pm to
quote:

Gary Larson Cartoon idea:

Primitive humans draw straws to see who goes into bear cave to see if it is dead yet.

Or paper rock scissors, but it's rock rock rock.

You mean like this one?

Posted by THog
Member since Dec 2021
2252 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:36 pm to
How do they know he didnt kill the bear and was fixing to eat, but had information on hillary?
Posted by soccerfüt
Location: A Series of Tubes
Member since May 2013
65881 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 5:45 pm to
Well, well, well.

How the turntables…..

I guess 13,600 years ago the question was “Which Bichon baw is best?”
Posted by Bestbank Tiger
Premium Member
Member since Jan 2005
71379 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 6:24 pm to
The man mated with the bear.

Their offspring mated with a pig.
Posted by Mushroom1968
Member since Jun 2023
1622 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 6:26 pm to
Bears have better personalities than alligators
Posted by GreenRockTiger
vortex to the whirlpool of despair
Member since Jun 2020
42325 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 6:30 pm to
quote:

The man was 5'5
too short iwnhi
Posted by cadillacattack
the ATL
Member since May 2020
4471 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 6:38 pm to
Posted by chili pup
Member since Sep 2011
2795 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 7:51 pm to
quote:

Swiss Man Mauled By Bear in Cave (13,600 years ago)


They are just throwing shite against the wall to see what will stick.
Posted by Sidicous
Middle of Nowhere
Member since Aug 2015
17267 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 8:00 pm to
I’ve seen worse teeth in the quad. Not bad at all for 13,600 years.
Posted by uaslick
Tuscaloosa
Member since May 2011
850 posts
Posted on 5/3/24 at 8:17 pm to
quote:

he was lean but muscular.


Paleo diet. I bet he was fat and lazy until Dr. Gok did a series of blood work on him.
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