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Personal Theory - When the subject of marriage is brought up
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:08 am
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:08 am
I have a theory. When they, meaning a woman, bring the subject of getting married up, I think a clock starts in their head. Perhaps some clocks are shorter or longer than others, but it seems like they start a countdown timer, even if they don't even actually acknowledge or understand it themselves.
Anybody else ever experience this or have similar thoughts?
Anybody else ever experience this or have similar thoughts?
This post was edited on 10/21/23 at 7:08 am
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:11 am to EarlyCuyler3
Women are planners by nature. They are always evaluating and considering every important decision they make.
They do it with their jobs, their children, their friends, and their daily choices.
You are also one of those decisions.
Don’t take it personal.
Find a girl who is making good decisions everywhere else and convince her to choose you.
Edit: there has been some confusion about my post. The above evaluation is for women making decisions about important things in their lives. (Marriage, college, moving to a new city, etc)
For decisions they deem insignificant (tattoo, get a pet, sleep with Chad, argue with their MIL,etc) it’s all emotion and impulse.
They do it with their jobs, their children, their friends, and their daily choices.
You are also one of those decisions.
Don’t take it personal.
Find a girl who is making good decisions everywhere else and convince her to choose you.
Edit: there has been some confusion about my post. The above evaluation is for women making decisions about important things in their lives. (Marriage, college, moving to a new city, etc)
For decisions they deem insignificant (tattoo, get a pet, sleep with Chad, argue with their MIL,etc) it’s all emotion and impulse.
This post was edited on 10/21/23 at 12:01 pm
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:13 am to SECdragonmaster
quote:
Women are planners by nature. They are always evaluating and considering every decision they make.
They do it with their jobs, their children, their friends, and their daily choices.
Good point.
In my case, it was just a choice on my of wanting to wait things out longer and see how things went with her child growing up. He's close to the age where things can go batshit at the drop of a hat.
Edit: Some other factors as well, pretty significantly including my not wanting to stay in the same area forever and her understandably not wanting to uproot her son.
This post was edited on 10/21/23 at 7:15 am
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:17 am to SECdragonmaster
quote:
Women are planners by nature. They are always evaluating and considering every decision they make.
Except financial decisions
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:18 am to EarlyCuyler3
When the best friend(s) start getting engaged and married, the heat gets turned way up.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:21 am to EarlyCuyler3
Just know that because her son isn’t yours you will always be lower priority.
Always.
Always.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:26 am to SECdragonmaster
quote:
Women are planners by nature. They are always evaluating and considering every decision they make.
They do it with their jobs, their children, their friends, and their daily choices.
You are also one of those decisions.
Don’t take it personal.
Find a girl who is making good decisions everywhere else and convince her to choose you.
That's a lot of words to say pussy whooped.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:26 am to TygerTyger
quote:
Just know that because her son isn’t yours you will always be lower priority. Always.
This is a fact for sure. Can attest to this
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:26 am to TygerTyger
quote:
Just know that because her son isn’t yours you will always be lower priority.
Always.
Of course. And if it wasn't that way, that would be a really bad sign.
I understand the baws that refuse to date women with kids. I was one of them for a long time. Took a chance and was rewarded greatly for it.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:28 am to SECdragonmaster
quote:
Women are planners by nature. They are always evaluating and considering every decision they make.
Only holds water as long as emotions (real, perceived, imagined, or otherwise) are not entered into the equation, at which point all bets are off.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:43 am to EarlyCuyler3
quote:
In my case, it was just a choice on my of wanting to wait things out longer and see how things went with her child growing up. He's close to the age where things can go batshit at the drop of a hat.
Edit: Some other factors as well, pretty significantly including my not wanting to stay in the same area forever and her understandably not wanting to uproot her son.
So, basically, you're dating a single mother but won't commit to her and blame her son for it.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:44 am to Saint Alfonzo
quote:
So, basically, you're dating a single mother but won't commit to her and blame her son for it.
Nowhere close to reality, but ok.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:46 am to EarlyCuyler3
quote:
Just know that because her son isn’t yours you will always be lower priority. Always. Of course. And if it wasn't that way, that would be a really bad sign.
Wait a second. It isn’t a bad sign for a mother to prioritize her child while dating. In fact, it’s a great sifn.
If however, she is not willing to rightly order things once married ( God, spouse, kids, everyone/everything else) then that would be an issue.
I am divorced and remarried. We both brought kids to the marriage and yes there are times when I have to step aside on something that deals with my stepsons (whom I love dearly! True blessings in my life) but by and large we keep each other as higher priorities. That’s how it was intended to be
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:47 am to EarlyCuyler3
quote:
When they, meaning a woman, bring the subject of getting married up, I think a clock starts in their head.
When a woman brings up marriage, she's already made up her mind. She is gauging how serious you are.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:49 am to EarlyCuyler3
quote:
Nowhere close to reality, but ok.
It is reality. The two reasons you gave revolve around her son. One, you want to take a wait and see approach on how he grows up. Two, you want to move and those plans are hampered by her child. Don't date a single mother if the child cramps your style.
This post was edited on 10/21/23 at 7:51 am
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:50 am to Quatre Pot
At some point, an internal clock says it is time to build a nest and find a mate that will protect it while they continuously move twigs around in the nest and rear the chirins. If you are in her circle with that happens, you will be considered.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:54 am to Havoc
quote:
When the best friend(s) start getting engaged and married, the heat gets turned way up.
The same with divorces. It's contagious.
Posted on 10/21/23 at 7:56 am to EarlyCuyler3
Inter-species understanding is not possible. You shouldn't even try.
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