These women wanted a symbolic expression of self-love. So they married themselves

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Brittany Rist walked down the aisle in a dress and a white veil to the song, “Girl.”

“Girl, perfectly her, broken and hurt,” crooned artist SMYL in a falsetto. “Shake off the night and don’t hide your face.”

It was Rist’s wedding. But there was no beaming partner waiting at the altar.

Wearing a rose-colored dress, the 34-year-old read her vows alone in front of a mirror in her backyard. She’d accepted her own proposal and given herself a ring. Instead of a spouse, a red velvet cake awaited her, next to a bottle of Champagne.

Rist said “I do” to herself, and committed to loving herself for better or worse.

“I vow to never settle or abandon myself in a romantic partnership ever again,” she told her reflection in the mirror. “I vow to honor my calling and live life as a work of art.”

Rist did not have an officiant or guests at her self-wedding, and toasted herself at a solo reception.

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Months before the event, which she calls a “soul commitment ceremony,” she had separated from her son’s father after nine years together. She’d started working on healing her inner self, taken a vow of celibacy and signed up for therapy.

And that afternoon in November 2021, at her home in Ozark, Missouri, she punctuated her self-love journey with a statement of self-appreciation.

“I realized (that) in love and in relationships with other people, I wasn’t fully showing up and loving myself through that process, which made it really difficult to receive love from others,” she says. “We pour all of this time and money and energy into marrying other people, and we don’t ever pour that back into ourselves.”

As part of her self discovery, she decided to commit to herself.

“I thought, ‘Why don’t I just buy myself a ring? Why don’t I just love myself fully during this time, and have a little ceremony?’ It felt empowering to sit in front of the mirror and feel that I love all of me and my scars and all that makes me feel unlovable.”

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The concept of self-marriage, or sologamy, has been around for years. In a “Sex and the City” episode that aired in August 2003, Carrie Bradshaw seeks revenge on a frenemy by telling her that she’s marrying herself and is registered at luxury shoe store Manolo Blahnik.

No data exists on how many people celebrate sologamy with ceremonies, but the practice has been explored in a handful of recent news articles.

CNN talked to four women who’ve married themselves. They describe the act as a symbolic expression of self-love and an affirmation of a deep, meaningful relationship with one’s self. They also say it has nothing to do with swearing off future partnerships with a spouse, which they say is a popular misconception.

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